Power Move: Woman(?) Dresses Her Pet Anteaters In Human Clothes

 

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Where is your God now?!?! This seriously might be one of the most psychotic things I’ve seen in my life. I’m not talking about the anteaters dressed to the 9’s. I’m talking about that thing that dresses them. The article says it’s a woman? No shot that’s a woman. I’ve seen really ugly women before. Like vial, unfortunate looking hogs. I’ve woken up hungover next to them on occasion. But this isn’t one of them. This thing shows no indication of being a woman. And don’t give me this “long hair” shit. Hippie bros rocked that hair like it was their job back in the day. Not to mention that freshly shaved mustache is screaming at me through my computer screen.

Could you imagine walking down the road and seeing this thing walking down power ant eaters in sweaters? I would turn around and walk the other way so fast you’d think I just saw an ex-girlfriend. I’ve crossed the street when people are walking their dogs or I see 1 or more black people. No way in HELL I’m passing a crew of ant eaters and a bat shit insane man-woman-beast. Might as well pack my things and shake hands with the devil himself.

– Silky Mitts

Original Link: Barstool Sports

 

p.s. I’d be remiss if I didn’t include this picture. Everyone knows red leather makes the girls weak in their knees. Sucks for all the other bro ant eaters who will have to wait for this guys left overs.

EMERGENCY P.P.S: Realized who this woman looks EXACTLY like…

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Spitting image.

 

 

Rutgers Goes From Firing Their Batshit Insane Coach to Being Ranked #1 Sluttiest College In America. I’d Count That As a Win.

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So by now I’m sure everyone already knows about the Mike Rice situation. I don’t get why it was such big news, but it was. Anyway a week or so after Coach Rice gets fired, Rutgers became the #1 sluttiest school in America according to Barstool Sports, the go-to website that knows more about college sluts than college sluts do. Just an incredible turn of events for SlutgersU. The Rice video’s come out, give Rutgers a bad rep. Looks like Rutgers reputation is gone now, right? Wrong. Sluttiest college in the US of A. Bam! Just brilliant. I mean yeah if you want a good education and no STD’s than whatever, enjoy the worst 4 years of your life at some random community college where their idea of fun is drinking pepsi and eating pizza on a friday night. But if you’re a dude who wants to do nothing but drink and fuck for four years than NJ’s state university is for you. If you’re in high school and reading this I would advise applying to Rutgers. As long as the grass is green, sluts will be sluts. And Rutgers has sluts.

 

– Silky Mitts

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