Katy Perry Says Slutty Pop Stars Should Stop Flaunting Their Bodies

I’m confused here. Katy Perry judging slutty pop stars? The same Katy Perry that posed nude for that candy land song? Don’t get me wrong, I love how Perry flaunts her massive tits around in everyones grill piece and acts like shes not doing it. Kind of a major turn on actually. Like she thinks she’s being so elegant and professional when her diabolical fun bags are exploding through my computer screen. If that’s classy in her eyes I would love to see what slutty is. Probably the most fucked up shit you can possibly think of, but in a good way.

I don’t know what her angle is here, but I have a feeling mrs. perry is about to unleash the kinkiest shit you, me, or any other red blooded american male has ever seen. And that can be very dangerous. With eggplants like Katy Perry’s there could be another world war on our hands. Be on the look out, cause I have a hunch that them titties are going to have a major impact on the world very soon.

– Silky Mitts

Original Link: Page Six

Maxim Puts Manti Te’o’s Fake Girlfriend In Hottest 100 List.

Really Maxim? Trying to be topical much? This is the dumbest thing I’ve seen since Mind of Mencia. What editor saw this and gave it the green light? Gotta be a blind monkey with downs right? Only explanation to wasting a spot on Maxim’s top 100 with a floating bikini. And they made her #69 too. Get it! Like, the sex move?! That’s genius! Jesus christ, Maxim. Put your bat down and stop abusing that horse that’s been decaying for quite some time now. We get it. Te’o didn’t have a girfriend. It was funny the first 138,749,756,174,357,287,465 times we heard a fake GF joke. But honestly, if you make a derpy Te’o joke right now best believe I’m gonna roll my eyes so hard I’ll be able to see my cranium. Not to mention putting a fake woman at #69 means you’re implying there are 31 women who are uglier than an invisible woman. A stat like that will obliterate any woman’s self esteem.

So great joke Maxim, glad to know you think #70 Nina Agdal…

was ranked uglier than this…

– Silky Mitts


Maxim Top 100 List

p.s. Miley Cyrus at #1? Is this list a joke and it’s just going over my head? Was the list made by The Onion? Is it April 1st? I seriously don’t understand this at all. My head hurts. I’m going to bed.

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