NHL All-Star Game Changed to 3-on-3 Format. Here are Silky Mitts Best Team Lineup Combinations

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*Picture taken from NHL Hitz, one of the greatest games of all time*

So the NHL announced that this all star game will be a 3-on-3 mini playoff. Atlantic plays Metro for 20 minutes then Pacific plays Central. Winner of each game play each other for the championship. Pretty cool idea that will be fun for the fans. I have a feeling at least one goalie is going to get injured from facing so many repetitive odd man rushes, but whatever lines Bettmans pocket he’s gonna do.

Many line combinations are possible, and many people have their own opinion. But that’s just what it is, their opinion. Silky Mitts doesn’t give opinions he spits straight facts. Part of being the best. So instead of waiting I’ll tell you the best possible 3 on 3 (+ a goalie) scenario for each division.

Atlantic 

The 3: Stamkos (TBL), Eichel (BUF), Subban (MTL).

Goalie: Carey Price

V8Xgynoz

Notes: I know what you’re already going to say. Eichel’s good but he’s so young has so much to prove still yada yada yadda well that’s why my mitts are made of 100% pure columbian silk and yours are made of cement. Anyone with eyes can see that Eichel is one of the most entertaining players in the entire NHL right now and he’s been playing for the god damn Sabres. 99% of his goals are highlight reel goals, so putting him in 3 on 3 with Stammer and Subban is a no brainer. There are other options, sure, but they’re wrong.

Just Missed: Larkin (DET), Krejci (BOS), Silky Mitts (Free Agent)

Metropolitan

The 3: Ovechkin (WAS), Tavares (NYI), Yandle (NYR)

Goalie: Henrik Lundqvist (NYR)11195_content_Gotham-Magazine-Henrik-Lundqvist-3 *If you thought you were gonna get a hockey blog from Silky Mitts without seeing at least one Lundqvist picture you’re out of your mind*

Notes: Pretty solid team right here. I could have left all 3 players out and just put Hank in and I think at the very least the Metro win the tourney by about 3-4 goals. But honestly Ovie and Tavares together makes my computer shoot up cause I’m typing on my lap. Truthfully I don’t like Ovie and think he’s lazy but he’s such a pure goal scorer it’d be a sham to not have him in. Yandle is the perfect 3-on-3 defensemen (along with Subban and Karlsson) so his addition would make for some real excitement.

Just Missed: Zuccarello (NYR), Malkin (PIT), Cammalleri (NJD)

Central

The 3: Benn (DAL), Kane (CHI) Seguin (DAL)

Goalie: Pekka Rinne (NSH)

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*That’s Rinne btw. No shot anyone (including myself) would know who that was if you ran into him on the street but he’s holding a puppy in this picture so fuck you I’m using it*

This is probably the most difficult one. Central is sort of stacked. Sequin and Benn as of right now have already combined for 53 points. FIFTY-THREE FUCKING POINTS! Between two fucking people. And it’s only November fucking 19th. That’s the shit that makes me want to down a bottle of nyquil and see if I can JO before I fall asleep. It’s that insane. Kane is also a no brainer leading the league in points, goals and assists (I guess those rape allegations really got to um, uh?) There’s obviously others that are very deserving, but once again I don’t believe they’re as deserving as these 3. And if you read the top of the blog post you’d see I’m never wrong.

Also, anyone that thinks Reto Berra deserves the spot over Rinne probably has to type on a keyboard  with one finger at a time.

Just Missed: Klingberg (DAL), Panarin (CHI), Taresenko (STL)

Pacific

The 3: Toffoli (LAK), Gaudreau (CAL), Burns (SJS)

Goalie: Quick (LAK)

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Notes: Gaudreau is another one of those players that’s electric to watch. And he’s still so young, lotta talent. Burns is another great defensemen for a 3-on-3 because of the beard and the offensive skill he possesses. But mostly the beard. Need it want it gotta have it. Quick’s pretty decent I guess.

Just missed: Hall (EDM), Pavelski (SJS), one of the Sedin twins, doesn’t matter which one (VAN).

– Silky Mitts

 

Have any feedback you want to dish at Sir Silky Mitts? Think you can make a better lineup? Well then you didn’t read the article cause mine was silky smooth. But comment anyways if you’d like.

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Kaner Does It Again.

(vine made by @JFeitelberg from barstoolsports.com)

Is it just me or does it seem like every time the Blackhawks win a playoff game in OT it’s scored by Patrick Kane? I swear to god this kid is so talented it makes my head hurt. He’s won a silver medal in the olympics, got the game winning Stanley Cup goal against Philly a couple years ago, had this double OT series winning goal last year that included the top 3 nicest cellys ever…

oh and for those of you counting at home he’s 25. Which makes me want to rock my head through a cement wall. Say what you want about how he doesn’t show during the olympics (he really reaaaaaally didn’t show at all this past olympics) but during the NHL he comes through every single time you need him. Pure talent from head to toe. What a game, gonna make a great finish to the series.

– Silky Mitts

@fgsilkymitts

Well, That Sucked.

Absolutely brutal. Played a great first period and half of the 2nd and then just shit the bed. Rangers got 17 shots in the 2nd and couldn’t net one and the Flyers got 2. Emery got his shit together and played great. I love how Flyers fans react to Emery yesterday. After the first period social media was blowing up asking for Emery’s head. Saying how he is the worst post to post goalie and he blows. Send in the backup. Then he has 2 good periods and all of a sudden every fan is comparing him to Jonathan Quick’s Stanley Cup run in 2012. Hysterical. He lets in 6 goals in the first 4 periods and then finally blanks the Rangers for the last 2 periods and everyone calls him the greatest. Rangers have always and will always struggle to score in the post season. Don’t know why, just the way it is. Going up 2-0 heading in to Philly obviously would have been huge but at 1-1 stealing a game in that shit hole town is a must for the Rangers. The King has been kind of shakey (probably in part to not facing many shots and getting into a flow) and Nash has been awfully quiet. Tuesday at 8 is the next game and the Rangers absolutely cannot let this series slip away from them. The drunken inbreds will no doubt make a tough atmosphere for the Rangers to play in, but they gotta stay strong. LGR

– Silky Mitts

It’s Here! It’s Finally Here! Rangers Playoff Hockey Is About To Begin!

http://www.rangerland.net/home/wp-content/themes/arras-theme/library/timthumb.php?src=http://www.rangerland.net/home/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Rangers-banner1.jpg&w=630&h=250&zc=1

Been waiting for this day since the start of the season. More excited than Kim Jong Un holding a flamethrower in front of his loved ones. For the past couple years now the Rangers have been a team that are expected to make the playoffs, especially after last year when they dropped their pants from the high towers of 1st place and took a nice dump on the rest of the East. I was skeptical of the signing of AV, especially after the rocky start, but after severely improving a horrid power play and getting the rags to the 2nd position in the Met, I fully believe AV can make a serious playoff run. The zucc-brassard-pouliot line has been absolutely incredible and a HUGE factor as to why the Rangers have made it to where they are. Much rather would have had the rags play the Blue Jackets 1st round and let the Pens and Flyers kill each other but here we are. Flyers are a very resilient team that play with grit so the rangers are gonna have to come out strong and show other teams that playing at The Garden during the playoffs wont be easy. St. Louis gonna have to step it up, Nash keep playing great, and Hank keep wearing those Armani’s. LGR!

– Silky Mitts

 

Apparently Ball Hockey Is An Actual Thing…And The “Athletes” Lost Their Shit At The Championship Game.

(Scrap starts around 2:10)

I’ve never in my life seen anyone take their lives so seriously. It’s fucking ball hockey. No one cares bro. Relax.

In the 2013 ball hockey world championships Justin Pender goes full Hulk and has a rampage that ends with 2 injured Czechs, an official on a stretcher and something like 30 consecutive tweets which he’s trying to pass as an apology letter. Normally no one would say anything about cause it’s, ya know, ball hockey, only this guy plays in the ECHL so he’s somewhat known in the hockey community. Here’s a quick recap of what happened: Czech team puts in an empty net goal to take a 5-1 lead. The team then goes ape shit, jumping up onto the boards and what I only imagine is defined as “whyling out”. Pender then decideds to start cross czeching (cause fuck you, I make the puns) the nearest guy to him at the faceoff circle. The cross czechs go to full blown punches as hes landing hay-maker after hay-maker, tossing the man like an absolute ragdoll. The net minder for the Czech team then jumps on his own player. It looked like a scene outta The Office Beach Games when Dwight sumo jumped onto Andy. Anyways Pender continues his bro rage in front of a crowd filled with the players moms and dads. The ref somehow gets in the middle and goes down hard.

Moral of the story, don’t tell Pender that ball hockey’s for pussies.

-Fresh Twig

Gregory Campbell Breaks Leg Blocking Shot…Continues To Finish His Shift.

Un. Real.  Gregory Campbell putting every athlete out there on notice right now. This right here is exactly why you cannot compare hockey players to any other sport on the face of the earth*. The man LITERALLY broke his leg. The bone snapped. Not only did he get back up on his two feet, but he continued his effort to get the puck out of the zone. I’ve never seen anything like it. When basketball players think they might have felt a breeze they immediately go straight down to the ground as if they got shot. If baseball players tummy’s hurt they sit out 3-4 weeks. And don’t get me started on soccer players. Epitome of pussy athletes. I know it. You know it. Their own parents know it.  The NHL postseason is different than any other postseason and Campbell demonstrates why.

– Silky Mitts

 

*Maybe extreme ironing. Shit gets real.

Ice in the veins.

Yo Pierre McGuire…You Just Got Facialed Bro.

Now I’m no fancy pants hockey announcer like this chode Pierre, but if I had to go on a hunch I would say trying to interview the captain of a team that just lost a game 7 in OT is probably the dumbest thing you can do. Couldn’t have been happier with Zetterberg’s reaction. Yo, Pierre, the man needs to console with his team after a heart breaking defeat. Get lost you fucking door knob.

– Silky Mitts

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